Drinking alone

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oddly, i appreciate the best wines when sipping alone...am more focused, so to speak
I think drinking alone has got a bad rap from the AA crowd. I don't think it's any worse than drinking socially, and I quite enjoy it myself. It's all a matter of how much you drink, how often, what for, and what the effect of drinking is on you.
I agree. It's contextual.
And you don't gotta share 'em!
Yeah. AA scares the hell out of me. It's basically a cult that doesn't get treated like one because it performs some questionable "public service" by making drunks ashamed of themselves.

I think a lot of perceptions about alcohol have been warped by propaganda just like any other drug.
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The idea of drinking only when in social situations brings up all sorts of weird ideals. Like, it assumes that the only reason we drink is to feel good around other people. But why do we need these other people? What benefit are they going to do for us, except then take advantage of our inevitable trashiness and lack of self control (and i don't mean this in just a sexual sense, i mean we don't hold back in our conversation when drunk, and generally say or do things we wouldn't normally).
What is so wrong with feeling good about yourself alone? If AA is about making drunks feel ashamed of themselves, they are ashamed by what they do to other people, or make themselves look to other people. There wouldn't be any harm if drunks got drunk alone, in private.
Writing this i'm kind of thinking there are these weird mastabatory parallels. Sure, its accepted, but there is still this stigma surrounding masturbation. Same thing about drinking alone.
Maybe since we are social creatures we feel the need to shame people into doing things in a group. i think this is bullshit, because there are extroverts AND introverts.
Anyway, enough rambling, where is my wine?
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i THOROUGHLY agree. i oftentimes enjoy a glass of wine or a vodka and coke while watching the tyra banks show. no shame in it, although people make me feel bad about it.
what about NA?
I agree entirely.

For the record, whackin' off doesn't hurt anything either.
I don't get that. Why would anyone actually care?
It's sort of the same deal.

The whole "surrendering your life to a higher power" thing inherent in most of the 12-step programs sort of freaks me out. Reasonable people don't solve their problems that way. All it does is force them to admit they're weak and they can't do anything without religion, which to me sounds like something a cult would do. It's a dangerous way of thinking, and when it's being used to prey on addicts, it's completely, inexcusably horrible.
Which is all well and good, given that we're having an academic argument here. But I think that if someone is full-blown psychologically and physically dependent on a substance to the point that it interferes with their lives, we're talking about something different. If your choices are keep doing it and die, white-knuckle it and fall off the wagon, or join AA or NA, you can be damn sure I'd be swallowing my fucking pride to save my own life.
yeah. or if the man says "hey go hang out with these mofs. maybe you;ll learn something"
I can't deny that those organizations have helped people, but I really feel that the predatory nature of them negates a lot of the good they do. I'd probably go into rehab or join AA or NA if I had to, myself, but I really think the principle behind things like AA and NA is an extreme neo-prohibitionist one, and the programs are based on the idea that the only acceptable goal is "clean" rather than "functional," and as such, I wouldn't be happy about it. I really don't think anyone should be treated like some sort of amoral social outcast or have to adopt the identity of "deviant" just because they happen to enjoy drugs and alcohol, both of which are a hell of a lot of fun when used properly. It's all based on the idea that sober life is somehow more meaningful than one spent in a drunken/stoned/strung out/etc. haze, and it's not in the slightest.

And besides, it's one thing to voluntarily join, but a lot of people join because they got convicted of something that requires it. Drug convictions, maybe repeat DUI's, whatever. These people in no way deserve to be victimized by this way of thinking, that somehow drug users are lesser people than teetotallers. Putting them in a situation where they're essentially forced to admit that they have a "problem" that needs to be "fixed" is ridiculous. Alcoholism isn't a problem until you don't want to be an alcoholic anymore. Same with drug addiction. Even then, the fact that the primary option is AA or NA is a load of crap.
I take your point, but you're doing the same thing you're accusing the legal system of doing- lumping in the recreational users with actual addicts. People who enjoy getting hammered alone once in awhile or who pop the occasional upper or downer are not the same as addicts. Addicts can't have "just one beer" or "just one pill" or get "a little buzzed for an evening." It's an all or nothing proposition for addicts, because their substance use has moved out of the realm of their control. Take somebody who's been in AA or NA for 20+ years and give them one shot of liquor or one pill, and one of two things is going to happen. They'll be fine, which isn't likely, or they'll be in exactly the same spot they were 20+ years ago, the day before they joined AA or NA, the day they realized they were screwed if they didn't get some help. Addicts are not "functional" unless they are clean. Unfortunately it's just a function of human physiology.

All that said, AA and NA aren't predatory. They're simply there for anyone who wants to walk in. What motivates them to walk in, whether it's self-recognized need or a count-mandated treatment, is not the business of AA or NA. They don't judge, they don't turn people away, they simply try to help the people who walk in the door.

But, back to the point- you're not an addict, or an alcoholic. If you want to get drunk by yourself once in awhile, that's your business. I do think that you're right that the term "alcoholic" shouldn't be slung around in the context of a joke. It devalues the struggles of true alcoholics and pisses off people who aren't.
Also, I disagree with your statement that alcoholism isn't a problem until you don't want to be an alcoholic anymore. It's a problem when it separates you from the people you love, when it keeps you from being able to hang onto a job, when you get behind the wheel and put the lives of others at risk. Alcoholism is a problem the second it begins to exist for a person.
I agree, SPH, and alcoholism also causes some serious health problems over time. My alcoholic aunt in Idaho has permanent nerve damage from years of heavy drinking (and liver function problems, etc). Sometimes her legs just stop working. She's not even 60 yet, and although her Dr. told her clearly that drinking is causing these problems... she continues to drink. She's not stupid, but she does not want to stop drinking. It's too much a part of her life. I would definitely say that her alcoholism IS a problem (for her and others), and that she prefers to continue being an alcoholic. It's her choice - she's a grownup, and she has an adult (alcoholic) son to take care of her, but the alcohol is making the choice for her... and that's not cool.
I guess you're right. Personally most of my problem with these organizations is what they do for non-addicts. People who were sent there by courts who really don't have a problem. At that point, it's entirely their choice what they put in their body and as far as I'm concerned, the government has no right to tell them otherwise.

Hell, I'd say it's entirely their choice until they decide they need help. If an addict alienates their loved ones, that's their problem. No one can solve it for them and if they don't want to get help and solve it themselves, no one can really do much for them. No one should be forced to get "help" against their will. At that point, it's not help so much as coercion and brainwashing.

I really have no problem with AA and NA as long as all attendance is voluntary.
"Her choice" is most of what I'm getting at here.

If someone doesn't want to get help, why should they?

It's sad what alcoholism does to people, but you can't help someone who doesn't want it. If someone is happy being an alcoholic, no AA meeting is going to change that.
I'd say that NA has helped me learn how to live without drugs. i don;t see it as being about coerced or brainwashed at all. and really when you think about it attendance is voluntary. do you think that everyone who gets put on probation actually goes to these things, hell naw, some people just fudge it on their green cards or just don't go at all.

Do you get other options?
jail or a life on the run from the law.
Yeah. Man, shit sucks.

All shit, everywhere.

I'm beginning to think I really do genuinely hate most things and most people.
did you feel the same way the next morning? being trashed is great but always a price to pay!
I actually usually feel fine in the morning, believe it or not. A little "off" but the full-on hangover is rare.

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I'm Soup. Hi.

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